Flash Back

My word. I'm feeling old.

Friday (or Saturday if we're feeling lazy) is cleaning day. We do our respective jobs or switch off and do a different job, and normally I like to crank up some sort of working music. That's why I was in my brother's bedroom today looking at his CDs. My music had gotten boring and he normally has really rockin' music. I know, I know.

What I didn't know was that I was about to be shocked. Two from the bottom of his rack, sat a neon green on black CD. On the label was the title of the band and then the name of the CD: The Promise. I had to straighten up quickly and shout out the door, "William! You have my Plus One CD?!" I, personally, had thought that my Plus One CDs had gotten lost in the clutter of moving to this house.

Let me explain. There were five guys in this little band. It was epic. They got "New Artist of the Year" award in...are you ready for this?...2001. That's eight. EIGHT. 8. years ago. Wow. Now, if you're doing your math correctly, and you're about my age (21) you'll remember that during that time there were two bands on the "secular" music stage, N'Sync and Backstreet boys. (FLASHBACK!!!) Remember how they were so popular? Well, Christian music, which was all I listened to back then (give me a break, my parents were my music muses, and they listened to christian and classical... I was 13!), Christian music decided to copy the secular industry's boy band idea and pull together five guys for a "Christian boy band". They called the band "Plus One", as you can see by the cover on your left. Christian girls were quickly obsessed with them. Oh. Em. Gee! *cough*

Anyway.

As things would have it, I fell in love, and joined the fangirl-dom. My bestfriend Katie Beth did too. We knew all the names. Actually, from left to right on that album cover (and this is without looking them up) that's Nathan, Gabe, Jeremy, Jason, and Nate. I loved Nate...And Jason. And Katie Beth and I laughed at Gabe's hair. Enough said. We were obsessed. I had dreams about Plus One showing up and singing just for me. I memorized every single word on both their albums. (yes both their albums. They had a christmas album, but those rarely count, 'cause everyone has those.) I mourned when they broke up...or in other words, two of them left to go where God called. And now, about once a year, probably longer then that I am reintroduced to them.

As I write, I'm listening to "The Promise". It's very dated music, but I actually still like it. Sorta. Part of me can't believe I was that obsessed with them, but let's just say that my favorite concert of all time was the concert that my dad took me and Katie Beth and Grace and one of her friends to go see. The main act was Plus One. Of course.

Here's to all of you out there who have been "reintroduced" to Plus One through reading this, or finding a dusty CD somewhere in a box in your attic, or in my case, in your brother's CD rack. It's ok to let the fangirl-dom die. They are, after all, probably married and have kids now.

I'm chaotic...

Derrick: do you like big band music?

Me: depends on what it is

Derrick: Glen Miller, Percy Faith Orchestra
wait PFO isn't big band

Me: not WHO... WHAT.

Derrick: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZJE-onnw2gM
videos speak louder with pictures and words

Me: ok, I'll try watching that AFTER Esther

Derrick: you'll either immediately recognize it or you're officially from Mars

Me: yeah, I definitely recognize this. I've danced to this
it's a ton of fun to swing too
*to

Derrick: yeah, it reminds me of rose red

Me: huh?

Derrick: a stephen king movie

Me: oh
why?

Derrick: the movie centers around an autistic girl and that's the only song she ever listens to, it makes her happy

Me: well, it would make ME happy

Derrick: you're already happy enough
it would overstimulate you into disaster

Me: not all the time, but generally yes
I AM a disaster

Derrik: *catastrophe
sorry, typo

Me: I'm a catastrophe too!

Derrick: You can't be all forms of chaos!!!

Me: I can SO be!

Derrick: That's it! I'm sending FEMA after you
they're a-comin'
I'm listening to music from the 50's for seniors to workout to

Me: NOOO!!!! NO FEMA!!!
they're government related!
I'd rather have my community step in.

Derrick: this is an obama-nation
your government is your community

Me: O.O
I'm um...going now...

Derrick: they finally get there? Yeesh, FEMA's late for everything

Me: no, I'm NOT going with FEMA
I doubt they have the white coats to handle me

Derrick: ..........
good point

How did I get here?

I know I said in my last post that family is such a strange concept, but right now, I'd like to go out on a limb and say that life is a strange concept too.

Everyone seems to have these pre-conceived notions of what life is supposed to be like. Young girls are constantly watching their mommies and thinking, "I'm gonna be just like my mommy when I grow up." For me it was, "I'm going to become a mommy. I'm going to have a passel full of kids. I'm going to have a husband who can be a daddy to my kids." As I grew up, I would look at the girls around me and compare them and where they were in their life to me and where I was in my life "plan." There were other girls, one of them my at-the-time-best-friend, who met guys they really liked and who really liked them back. They would come to me, "Oh Hana! You'll never believe!" I'd sit there and be happy for them, but I'd want the same thing. Like I've said on here before, I was in love with the idea of being in love. Well, maybe I've said that, but it's pretty certain that I've given that impression.

If you had told me when I was 16 that at 21 I would still never have been kissed, would not have a steady boyfriend, would not be engaged, and would have only dated on guy for three months, and had been the one to break it off, I would have laughed at you and then thrown myself at the nearest guy to prove you wrong.

I look at my life and I think that if God had put me in a family that public schooled, I would have been seriously rebelious. I might have even given away my virginity, if not pregnant within the first couple of years at college. It is because God was gracious enough to stick me in a family where my parents are so integral in my life that I am who I am today. Granted, I'm still nasty and ugly inside, but thank God for his graciousness, His mercy.

I never ever expected to go into music education at school, but here I am. I'm moving into my third year of music education at ASU and I'm loving it! It's not everything I'm looking for, but it'll give me a good background on what I need to know to get a small studio going. I never would have thought that I would learn guitar on getting to college ("I'm never going to play something with frets!"). I never thought I would enjoy my crazy family the way I do. I never thought that I would enjoy the frantic hecticness of coordinating two jobs during the summer. I never thought I'd have two jobs during the summer. I never in my life thought I'd be content with being single, and yet, somehow, God has brought me to that very point. Thank God.

However, it is now late, and as I said in the previous paragraph, I have two jobs. I have to coordinate them, and that is going to take someone who is awake and on her feet. I am not really that. I need sleep, so I'll sign off. Just thinking about this, the fact that life hasn't quite turned out like I thought it would, but I'm so glad it didn't. This way has been much better. I'm glad I'm not the author of my own story.

Sleep well to all! and to all a Good Night!

~H

Welcome to the nuthouse!

Family is such a strange concept. Have you ever thought about it? You're born, and do you figure life out on your own? No. Instead God plops you down in this place where people not only care for you, by changing your diaper and teaching you about how to feed yourself and walk, but they also love you, no matter who you are, or how ugly you are, inside or out! These people are sometimes blood related, but other times they're not. No matter what, we'll normally drop everything to protect these people, because we know that no matter how ugly we are towards them, no matter how many times we stab them in the back, they'll still put themselves in harms way to protect us.

Sometimes you hate your family, other times you can't believe that you've had the good fortune to be related to them. Sometimes when you're with your friends, your family totally embarrasses you, but other times you can't believe that you ever thought you were embarrassed by them. I mean, duh, they're exactly like you are!

Thank God for family. Yeah, my family (according to a small plaque in a souvenir shop on the beach) is a lot like fudge: a ton of sweet with lots of nuts. :-D I'm the biggest nut of them all, and I can't wait to head for home.

Two days!

Craziness here I come!